Letter to Mommy
19 Aug
I don’t have children yet. I have dogs. So for my first Writers Workshop c/o Mama Kat, (via ComaGirl) I am responding to the prompt:
Dear Mommy and/or Daddy…(write a letter to yourself from one of your children)
The following is a letter written to me by new puppy, Lucy.
—-
Dear Mommy,
I understand we are just getting to know one another, but I would like to point out a few things. Please read carefully:
I appreciate all of your housebreaking efforts and peeing outdoors is cool, but I much prefer to poop on your floors. You could stop wasting your time saying “potty outside” because all I hear is “blah, blah, blah. hard wood floors.”
It seems that you and other dog like to go for long walks. That’s nice, but I think you can continue to carry me like the princess that I am. It’s really the least you can do considering how many “Awwws” I am contributing to your days.
Speaking of other dog…biting his tail is a whole lot of fun. Would it kill you to slather it in peanut butter? It would make the whole experience that much more enjoyable.
Regarding the tall bald man: is he deaf? Because you seem to be the only one that hears my cries in the morning. You should really have his hearing checked, at least for the sake of those bags under your eyes.
Whew, I am glad I got all of that out. Now that you’re better informed as to how I prefer things to go down, the rest of this puppy period should go well.
Love,
Lucy (aka Lazy Lu)
P.S. My purple polka dot leash and collar are awesome. You have great style and I want to thank you in advance for never putting me in a tutu or a t-shirt featuring a (not so) clever saying that prompts people to laugh at me.
When Lucy asked if the bald man was deaf, I was laughing so hard I had tears coming out of my eyes!!
That was just too funny.
I LOVE the “blah blah blah hard wood floors”!!! So funny!!
wicked cute!!!
You just made my day! I could picture the whole scenario with you carrying Lu while JJ is running around excitedly on their walk!!!!
Cute post!
Thanks for sharing!
http://dwivedi2326.blogspot.com/2010/08/dear-mom.html
That was freaking hilarious! And the pup, oh my. I’d let her poop on the hardwoods anyday. I want her.
Hahahahahahahahaha! I think you’re summed her up pretty darn well
I love discovering their little quirks. If it makes you feel better, we recently spent $3000+ to fence in our yard so that we could occasionally not have to walk Bubs to poo- he could happily poo close to home. Right? Yeah, not so much. Turns out he regards the yard as “sacred ground” or something, because he flatly refuses to poo there. Argh.
Maybe he’ll change his tune when winter hits and the prospect of walking a few blocks in -10 degrees isn’t quite so appealing.
Also- it took us 6-7 months before he quit peeing in the house. I feel your pain.
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